Thursday, 24 December 2009

Getting Published


Finally, I Got My First Article Published. View Here

Well, it took a while to make a start on writing articles and submiting them for publication and when I finally did the first three were rejected.
First of all my article was rejected because it was signed off using a bz9 URL. I love using bz9 URL's because they allow me to shorten my URL's but more importantly they put an ad on the top of the page linking to any other website I choose, they also contain buttons to twitter my page and/or share by any other means. It's a great form of viral marketing, Quite why EzineArticles class all bz9 URL's as rogue sites I don't know but it is very annoying.
Another reason my articles were rejected was because they contained references to E-cigarettes,
another baffling reason, anything that allows smokers who can't give up the habit to have a healthier and more socially accepted lifestyle has to be a good thing as far as I am concerned, a view apparently not shared by the good people at EzineArticles, still, I don't care, there is a certain sense of achievement getting your first article published a a feeling of progression as it's another link to my prime site

Wednesday, 9 December 2009

Sunday, 22 November 2009

Crazy, Dangerous & Illegal

How Overcome Driver Boredom

Do NOT try this

Like me you probably get bored when you have to drive long distaces especially
late at night or when the roads are really quiet.
I rarely get bored on such journey's, I play games to hone my driving skills.
There are many games you can play.
  • At night time try driving with no lights.
  • This is not as crazy or dangerous as it may sound, on country roads with no overhanging trees to cast shadows and a full moon with no clouds it can be suprisingly easy to see once your eyes become accustomed to the limited light.
I forget the the name of motor racing legend who's wife used to complain that her husband regularly drove his Ferrari late at night without using lights because he claimed it enabled him to see if there was any oncoming traffic thereby enabling him to take corners on the optimum line without having to worry about oncoming traffic.
  • Drive without windscreen wipers
During heavy downpours try to drive so fast the wind keeps your windscreen clear without having to use windscreen wipers.
  • Drive in reverse
Too easy you may think but do it without looking back, using only your night.

  • Drive using mirror verge's
Very tricky this one, drive by using only your wing mirror to see what has gone behind you.

  • Blind Driving
By far my favourite, this one allthough interesting just by itself can be made even more exciting with simple variations and challenges.
To play simply check your speed then close your eyes and start counting backwards from 100.
When you open your eyes you should still be on the road and your speed should be within 10% of when you closed your eyes.
Now, every time you close your eyes try adding 5 to your count. You will find this game getting more and more difficult......but wait it get's so much better.
When you see a corner in the distance close your eyes and don't open them until your in the braking zone for the corner(too early and your a wuss, too late aaa.. nnn..dd.)
To make the game more intresting try to time it so you open your eyes just when you have to brake for the corner.
On roads that you know try taking the corner with your eyes closed.
There is an old Austrilian game whereby you have a case of beer on the passenger seat and you see how many you can drink before crashing. I recommend combining this with blind driving( I prefer a bottle of whiskey/rum/vodka or whatever between your legs as this takes longer to fill the bladder but heightens the your driving skills quicker). The other advantage is that any pain resulting from the inevitable crash is minimised.
I've written off several vehicles in some spectacular crashes whilst playing these games but each time the pain has been nullified by being completely inebriated.
Indeed, there are many occasions when I have'nt even been aware of the crash until regaining conciousness in a police station and for this reason it is reccomended that you get completely intoxicated before attempting these games.
As I do a lot of travelling your comments and your own road games would be greatly appreciated

Sunday, 25 October 2009

Climate Change

Why Does The Maldivian Government Meet 6 Metres Underwater
On my last post I showed you how to embed a link into almost any
You Tube video to help you with viral marketing.
You'll notice I've done no such thing on this video, the issues are just too immense for
me to tamper with. Climate change is not a theory it is happening and the situation is
fast becoming critical. In 42 Day's the "COP15" conference takes place in Copenhagen.
It Is Time To Raise Your Voice and Change Climate Change. Many part's of our planet are already suffering dire effects from climate change, for those, time has already run out.

Now go and

Saturday, 24 October 2009

How To Embed Links Onto You Tube Video's

Embed Your Own Link Into Almost Any You Tube Video

The video I used for this demonstration has been viewed over 128,ooo,ooo times.
That's not a typo it really does say over 128Million times. To put that into context,
that is about double the population of the UK. Imagine the viral advertising possibilities with your link embeded into a video this successful.
To see how embeded videos can help with your marketing just click on the title to this article
Sorry that the audio goes out of sinc, I used "Camatsia" for the first time
and did'nt quite get it right, still, the method for doing this is so easy I
don't think you'll have any trouble, if you do let me know and I'll go over it with you.

Sorry Folks
This video has now been moved and
is password protected.
To view it you need to go

Friday, 23 October 2009

Sand Art

Stunning Sand Art

I was lucky enough to have a friend who posted a sand art video on my facebook wall, I was absolutely enthralled to watch this incredibly skilled (and very pretty) girl depict various scenarios through her art and music.

Kseniya Simonova is a Ukrainian artist who just won Ukraine's version of "America's Got Talent." She uses a giant light box, dramatic music, imagination and "sand painting" skills to interpret Germany's invasion and occupation of Ukraine during WWII.

<a href="">LinkedTube</a>

I was absolutely enthralled to watch this incredibly skilled (and very pretty) girl depict various scenarios through her art and music so went to my you tube channel and put Kseniya Simonova's Amazing Sand Drawing 2 on this page to compliment the one I was sent, please leave a comment to tell me which one you prefer, I think her show winning work is the best.

Sorry Folks I just noticed,(feb 2010) this video has been removed from you tube, I've no idea why, maybe the delectable Kseniya only want's us to see her winning work.

<a href="">LinkedTube</a>

Monday, 19 October 2009

Personality Quiz

I took the 43 Things Personality Quiz and found out I'm a

Risk-Taking Fun Loving Extrovert

Monday Morning Blues

Banish The Blues
I consider myself very fortunate because I don't get the "Monday Morning Blues",(MMB's)
that's probably due to a number of reasons.
First of all I've always had a job where the day of the week was largely irrelevant, being
in the tourist and service industry's has meant that working Sunday's and holidays has
been the norm. Monday has in fact often been the day to look forward to because that is
the day that I've been able to take it easy.
Secondly, as in most things in life it's all a question of attitude and mind conditioning.
Training yourself to look forward to the challengies of getting back to work (even if it's the challenge of battling monotony) is important in order for many people to eliminate the MMB's.
In fact developing a Positive Mental Attitude is something that will enhance your whole life and make you a happier and more likeable person.
I don't know if I was blessed enough to be born with a positive attitude, probably we all are
but then most people lose it as a result of life's knockbacks, as for myself I have managed to maintain mine because of a conscious effort to do so.
Anyway I'm starting to ramble and I don't have time for it today so let's get to the point,
which is very simple.
If your feeling a little bit of those MMB's watch this video,
If it does'nt bring at least a small smile to the corners of your mouth I'm sorry I misjudged the strength of your MMB's.
You are wonderful and somebody somewhere loves you and want's the best for you.

Sunday, 18 October 2009

My Dog Is Back

Vicious Pit Bull
Here he is again, that terrible vicious pit bull.
I made this a while ago but saved it in the wrong
format so I had'nt been able to do anything with it, and I
mean nothing, could'nt post it on You Tube, could'nt E-mail it,
could'nt do anything.
Luckily I found "Camatasia", a free way of making video's by capturing your screen. Voila! half an hour later here is the result,
the original video was made by using another free program
"Live Avatar Creator".
All the problems are entirely my own fault because not only do I not like paying for anything
I almost never read any instructions and just kind of muddle my way through stuff.
Anyway I'm sure you can get much better result's than I have so far. If you feel like giving
it a go, go right ahead both program's are a lot of fun and like most stuff I recommend
They are both......FREEEeeee!
I got "Live Avatar Creator" Here
I can't remember where I got "Camatasia" but you can get it Here.

Saturday, 17 October 2009

Free Stuff

Why Don't You Use Free Stuff?

I know we are all different, and thank goodness for that but I just can't understand why people don't use some of the really cool free stuff there is available on the internet.
Maybe it's a genetic thing and it's true that Yorkshiremen are tight but I just love free stuff.
whatever I need I try to find how I can get it for free before I pay for it and sometimes if I can't get it for free I just do without it or find a close substitute.

One freebie is something that was promised to us on science program's over 25yrs ago, and we've had it for a many years now is free communication. Oh yes everybody uses regular email but it's so outdated and old fashioned I simply don't know how it still manages to survive or why anybody still uses it.

For E-mails I use "The Worlds Coolest E-Mails" It allows me to track when my mails are opened, call it back if I make a mistake, send video mail, and the list goes on. You can read all about it in the review I wrote about it here.

Even More Amazing Is That I Get Paid Just For Using It.

Sign up for it now by clicking one of the liks in this text or go to the Free Stuff box near the top of this page and click on the Mailbox Casbox icon.
Another freebie I cannot understand why everybody does'nt use is "Skype" It is quite simply the best free communication medium on the 'net.
The other night I played backgammon, and had a conversation and a beer with a friend in Ireland, it was almost the same as sitting in a pub with him.
I had a IM (instant message) conversation with my brother who was sitting at his desk at work in London.
Best of all I had a video call with my wife who is in the Dominican republic, but I won't be telling you about that.
This will amaze you....are you ready to hear this?..I GET PAID FOR USING SKYPE..
Surprised? So was I. If you did'nt know you could get paid for using Skype ask me about it in the comment box.
Did you know people are still paying hundreds, sometimes thousands of Pounds/Dollars to learn about Internet Marketing, it's laughable I mean come on guy's really. There are thousands of people and company's out there begging you to sell their product for them (Yes me included, look here) Some of these people and company's will teach you everything there is to know about Internet Marketing (Me too! Heres some free videos to get you started).
Maybe you already have a business to promote or a product to sell. Perhaps you've heard about the fortunes being made in Internet marketing but thought it was difficult and did'nt know how to get started.

Whatever the case you should read this book
Like Everything Else Here, It's Free

Wednesday, 14 October 2009

Telemarketers No2

Wanna Have Fun With Telemarketers
I know it kinda looks like I'm
victimising telemarketers but really I'm not, I'm a salesman myself
so I have no agenda with anyone who works in sales, everybody needs to work
and actually I have a certain amount of respect for telemarketers.
Their success or failure is based 90% on their ability to maintain a good attitude.
Imagine how difficult that is, getting the phone slammed down on them, people blowing loud whistles, people shouting abuse, calling them all kinds of names.
All of this on top of the normal rejection every salesman has to endure and having all this
hour after hour, day after day, week after week, no getting in the car to rejuvenate
your attitude as you drive between appointments or wait for the next prospect
to enter your office.
Yes it must surely be the toughest job in sales.
Oh but what fun to wind them up, it's kinda irresisistable.
Just Listen To This

Monday, 12 October 2009

Benson: The Talking Dog


Out Of Sequence

Here's my wonderful talking dog again, he should have been placed
just above the monkey joke but for one reason and another
he ended up in the wrong place.
Not like him at all he has allways been incredibly
Actually, now that I think about it, it's really the
monkey's who got into the wrong place not Benson.
The trouble is those mischievous monkey'swere so eager
to show off their joke telling prowess
they persuaded me to post them before I
had got Benson ready for his debut.
Phew that's a relief I did'nt think Benson could have made such a dumb mistake it was all me and those crazy monkey's

Anyway here he is on his second performance. In this one he introduces the Monkey's telling the Penguin joke. After you listen to him you'll just have to scroll down to the monkey's to hear their joke. Alternatively you can click the link to the website Benson made and there you can view everything in context.


Is This Corridor Haunted?

The night before last I was in my bedroom which is at the
camera end of this photo.
It was sometime between
12:30 and 1:30 in the morning and I was laying
in my bed watchingthe TV when I heard the
sound of this door opening and a noise in the
corridor. Muting the sound on the TV
I listened for futher sounds and after a few
seconds I heard the door opening again,
leaping out of bed I opened my door to
investigate, seeing nothing I checked the rest
of the household, finding nothing amiss
I returned to bed.
Last night at about the same time I was in
that state of being half awake/half asleep
when I heard 3 gentle raps on my door, you know, the sort of knock somebody makes
when they don't want to disturb you if your sleeping but want to get your attention if your awake. Instantly I leaped from my bed and opened the door........nobody there.
So...... Is This Corridor Haunted?

Sunday, 11 October 2009

Talking Dog

Well it took quite a while,
I did'nt realise that the free version of the program I'd used to
make this video had expired and being a tightassed Yorkshireman
I'm not ready to pay for it just yet so this practice attempt
(done without reading the instructions)
was'nt really ready for use and took over 4hrs, no that's not a typo,
4hrs to download onto You Tube, that's about an hour for each minute
so don't worry it's not going to take you long to watch it.
Then I spent another couple of only partially successful hours trying to
put a couple of links on it and messing about with my You Tube account
Anyway here it is, let me know what you think.

Monday, 5 October 2009

Parking Fine

At Last

On the 10th of June I received a parking ticket, today after 3 appeals I received notice the authority had decided not to persue collection of the fine.
That's all well and good you might say but the problem is the authority's still refuse to admit the parking space where I received the ticket was incorrectly marked, this leaves them free to extort money from other motorist's who perhaps don't fight back quite as hard and pay this illegal charge.
Now I'll have to keep hassling them until they admit they are wrong.
Oh what fun !

Saturday, 3 October 2009

Wedding Anniversary

Wedding Anniversary

To celebrate the first wedding anniversary of:

Marina Del Carmen Nunez De Sole


Glynn Johnathan Sole

I am releasing, for the first timer ever anywhere the official wedding drawings

Sunday, 27 September 2009

Penquin Joke

This clip is so funny .
I've watched it over and over again and each time it makes me laugh.
What do you think?

Saturday, 19 September 2009

Telemarketers No1

Do you ever get fed up with telemarketers?
Of course you do.
Next time don't get angry with them
Have some fun instead.

Thursday, 17 September 2009


Lawyer's Smart Responses

Stupid …These are from a book called 'Disorder in the American Courts' and are things people actually said in court, word ­for ­word, taken down and nowpublished by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm whilethese exchanges were actually taking place.

ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?WITNESS: Yes.ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?WITNESS: I forget.ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?_____________________________________________________________________________________________________ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?_____________________________________________________________________________________________________ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?WITNESS: He's twenty, much like your IQ._____________________________________________________________________________________________________ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?WITNESS: Are you sh * tting me?_____________________________________________________________________________________________________ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?WITNESS: Yes.ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?WITNESS: Getting laid_____________________________________________________________________________________________________ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?WITNESS: Yes.ATTORNEY: How many were boys?WITNESS: None.ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?W ITNESS : Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?_____________________________________________________________________________________________________ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?WITNESS: By death.ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?WITNESS: Take a guess._____________________________________________________________________________________________________ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I'm going with male._____________________________________________________________________________________________________ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work._____________________________________________________________________________________________________ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight._____________________________________________________________________________________________________ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?WITNESS: Oral._____________________________________________________________________________________________________ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished._____________________________________________________________________________________________________ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question?_____________________________________________________________________________________________________And the best for last:ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.
I can't say I'm surprised at any of these and not because their Americans.
Any country could have provided examples of their 'learned' legal system in action.
Why don't you post some of your own favourites on here for us all to enjoy?

Wednesday, 16 September 2009

Road Safety

I was just wondering?

If you drive your modern, super safe, fully airbaged vehicle at 30 miles an hour with a couple of children sitting on the back seat without seatbelts on you will get prosecuted.
And yet a couple of kids loose on the front seats of a double decker bus, with their eyes inches away from a huge glass windscreen
Hurtling along a country road at 60 miles an hour
while sat on a seat 10Feet off the ground draws scant attention! Huh!

Thursday, 14 May 2009

Getting Sidetracked

Ok, Ok, I know I should'nt get sidetracked but just wait until you see what sidetracked me.

Have you ever sent an email then immediately wished you could call it back?

Have you ever wanted to send an email that could'nt be forwarded or copied?

Have you ever wanted to send an email that could self destruct?

Have you ever wanted to be able to track when your mails were read?

Well now you can do all that and a whole lot more with the worlds coolest free email.

What's more you can even make money out of it.

Now can you understand why I got distracted?

Have fun,


Monday, 20 April 2009

I'm So Excited

Hello Everybody,

Ok so I have'nt finished settingup my page yet but that's why I'm so excited, you see I know how good it's going to be.
Let me tell you what it's going to be about.

  • Mainly it's going to be a bit like one of them reality TV shows, I'm a complete beginer on everything to do with a computer (it's taken me 4hrs to get this far on my blog, just signing in and changing the standard page a bit), anyway the idea is to record my progress as I try to get a home business going with no money (I'm so broke I can't even pay attention).

Now I'm not completely clueless, (only almost)
I've been surfing the web for the last 6 months or so trying to figure out how I can make money without having any to begin with, I've downloaded about 600 books most of them promising to make me rich so I have plenty of reference material.
I've been signed up for and getting daily newsletters from about 30 internet 'Guru's (over 2000 of them unread) all promising me anything from$1,ooo to $180,000 a month for working part-time.
Finally I signed up as an Affiliate marketer that offered 6 income streams with the only obligatory expense being the web site hosting. This affiliation comes complete with a 30 day training course. I signed up about 10 weeks ago, so far I'm on day 11 Ok I did miss some bits out (they needed a bit more money, not much but when I say broke I mean I've had to cut my 30 a day cigarette habit down to 5).
My progress has'nt been slow because I'm lazy it's because of two reasons;
1. I'm very easily sidetracked.
2. I don't even know basic computer stuff so I have to learn everything from scratch.
3. My memory sucks so I have to re-learn everything each time I try to use it.

I figured this blog would force me to become more focused and also be useful to anybody else starting or thinking of staring an on line business you can see my mistakes and my triumphs I'll help you with all my free resources that'll save you search time, and I'm sure you can help me in plenty of different ways (free)

  • My blog is also going to be fun, I'll be throwing in lots of fun things I've been finding in all those hours I've been getting sidetracked.
  • There will be loads of stuff that even experienced marketers will want to download.

Anyway I hope you grow to like my site, I hope we can be useful to each other and I hope I can make it fun for us both.

Commitment: Thats what's needed to succeed, Hopefully not quite as much as the salesman in this clip. Is he the Fastest Salesman in the World?

Thanks for visiting,